Brennan's Big Mistake
by jemb
Summary: Brennan faces a life altering event but can she deal with it on her own? BA friendship


As Temperance Brennan escapes back to her office, she isn't sure how much longer she can keep this up. False smiles and feigning interest in what's going on at the lab and with her most recent case. In the safety of her office she slides into the chair behind her desk and puts her head in her hands.

_This can't be happening to me_ she thinks. _I'm not ready for any of this? How did I let it happen? _Her train of thought is interrupted by a knocking at the door. She sniffs back the tears threatening to spill and forces a smile onto her face as she greets her partner.

"Hey Booth. What are you doing here?" she asks as she starts to fiddle with the papers on her desk.

"I just stopped by to see what was happening with the case." he tells her.

"We're making progress." Brennan tells him.

"Okay." Booth saunters in and hovers by the desk.

"Something else?" she asks. _Please just go away. I can't deal with this right now_

"Just something Angela said." Booth tells her. "She's very perceptive you know."

"Uh huh?"

"Bones, what's going on?" Booth asks, his voice filled with concern.

"What do you mean?" Brennan feigns innocence.

"Okay, so I've known you for what, a couple of years now Bones." He says as he settles into the chair opposite her.

"I guess."

"So I think that I know you pretty well, as well as Angela maybe."

"Booth." Brennan sighs.

"Bones, I know when you've got something on your mind, especially something troublesome." He pauses, waiting for her to respond but she remains silent. "So what is it? What's got you all mixed up?" he asks.

"Nothing Booth." Brennan feigns another smile.

"Damn it Bones." Booth rises to his feet and leans across the desk, locking onto her blue eyes. His raw emotion takes Brennan by surprise and she jerks backwards.

"I…I…" she doesn't finish her sentence, she just jumps to her feet and runs from her office. Booth stands up straight and wonders if he's made a big mistake. He wanted Brennan to tell him what's going on, not run from him.

Brennan gets to the bathroom as quickly as she can. Thankfully it's empty when she enters. She finds the furthest stall from the door, thrusts herself inside and throws up in the toilet. Shaking, she sits back on her heels and wipes her mouth with toilet paper.

"Sweetie." She starts to panic when she hears Angela's voice. _Did she hear me being sick?_ She wonders. "Sweetie, are you okay?" Angela taps on the door of the stall gently.

"I'm fine Angela." Brennan replies.

"Forgive me Bren, but you don't sound okay." Brennan shifts her position and slumps down, leaning her back against the toilet door. _So maybe I have to tell Angela what's going on but that doesn't mean I have to face her to do it._

"Angela." Brennan starts. "I think I might be pregnant." She blurts out. There is silence on the other side of the door for a moment. Then, when Angela regains her composure she speaks again.

"Sweetie, will you please open the door." Brennan realises she can't hide forever so she clambers to her feet and slowly draws the door open. Angela doesn't say anything, she just pulls Brennan into a hug.

"Have you taken a test?" Angela asks as she draws back.

"Three." Brennan says. "One positive, one negative and one inconclusive. Angela, I can't do this. I'm not ready for a baby. I'll make a terrible mother." She rambles.

"Bren, calm down for a minute. Let's be rational here." Angela takes a deep breath and walks Brennan over to the sinks. "You need to go see a doctor and get a proper test done. We can deal with the rest after that." Angela says as Brennan splashes cold water on her face.

"I'll make an appointment." Brennan tells her friend as she pats down her wet face. "Angela, how did I let this happen?" Brennan slumps down onto the edge of the sink.

"Let's go back to the start. When did it happen and with whom?" Brennan sighs. "It's not Booth is it?" Angela asks. _I had to ask_ she thinks.

"No." Brennan shakes her head. "It was just some guy. Remember that night about a month ago when we went to that bar across town after the case with the Jefferson child?"

"Yeah, that was the night I got totally wasted." Angela remembers how ill she felt the next day.

"Well after you, Hodgins and Zach left, Booth and I hung out for a while until he got called away." Brennan takes a deep breath. "I was waiting on a cab outside and this guy started talking to me. One thing let to another and well…" she trails off.

"Sweetie, everything is going to be okay." Angela tries to assure her friend.

"How can it be okay Angela?" Brennan asks, feeling herself getting upset all over again. "I might be pregnant. I can't have a baby. I have a career, I have…"

"Honey calm down okay." Angela places her hands on Brennan's shoulders. "I'm with you all the way, no matter what happens. And you know you can count on all the rest of us too."

"You have to promise me one thing." Brennan says seriously. "You cannot, under any circumstances, let Booth find out about this." Angela takes a moment to understand why Brennan wants this. _She doesn't want him to see her as reckless and vulnerable._

"If you don't want me to then I won't. I promise." She pulls Brennan into a hug again, hoping to bring her friend at least a little comfort.

Angela emerges from the bathroom before Brennan so she can distract Booth, who both women know is waiting outside. He cares a lot about Brennan and he'd be worried about her sudden outburst.

"What's going on Angela?" Booth demands. "Is something wrong with Bones?"

"Brennan is just stressed Booth." Angela tells him. "She's got a lot on at the moment and not enough time to do it all." She hopes she looks convincing.

"Angela, I've seen Bones stressed before. She's never reacted like this."

"Trust me Booth. I know Brennan and she'll be back to her regular self in a few days when everything is worked out." She plants a smile on her face which seems to satisfy Booth for now.

"Okay, well I guess I can lighten her load a little. Tell Bones that there's no rush on the findings for the Henderson case. A couple of days won't make much of a difference." He shrugs. "I'll check in later." He adds as he saunters off. No sooner has he disappeared from view than Brennan emerges from the bathroom.

"Thanks Ang." She says softly.

"Go make that appointment." Angela orders.

Brennan is curled up at home on the couch, wrapped in a soft blanket. She is terrified about her doctors appointment tomorrow, especially since it will be two days before she gets the results. She isn't sure how she's going to hold it together, especially if Booth comes around again. Something about him makes her want to blurt out the truth but she really doesn't want him to know what a big mistake she's made. A sudden knock at the door startles her and for a moment Brennan panics that Booth is on the other side demanding to know what's going on with her. _He's always so concerned for me_ she thinks as she crosses the room to peek through the spy hole in the door. To her relief though, it is Angela standing on the other side. Brennan pulls the door open and feigns a smile for her friend.

"Sweetie, you don't need to pretend here." Angela says. The false smile drops from Brennan's face and her shoulders slump. "I came to keep you company tonight." Angela explains. Brennan then notices the overnight bag in Angela's hand. "I figured you'd be freaking out about tomorrow so I thought I could help take your mind off it with some movies." Angela continues as she walks into the apartment.

"Thanks Angela." Brennan says sincerely.

The two friends spend the evening watching chick flicks and pigging out on ice-cream and popcorn. For a few minutes at a time Brennan manages to forget about the major life altering event happening in her life. She knows that no matter what the outcome, she will never think about things in the same way again.

"Well I don't know about you sweetie, but I'm exhausted." Angela says. "How about we hit the sack. It's an early start tomorrow." Angela refers to Brennan's appointment at 8am.

"Sure, come on. I'll get you a pillow." Brennan smiles and rises to her feet. _I am so lucky to have a friend like Angela_ she tells herself. "Angela." She turns to her friend. "Thank you."

Brennan emerges from the doctor's office with a scowl on her face.

"What happened?" Angela asks.

"That man." She huffs. "I thought doctors were supposed to be impartial, non judgemental." She fumes.

"What did he say."

"It isn't what he said, it's how he looked." Brennan explains. "He looked at me like I was some kind of hussy."

"I'm sure he didn't mean to." Angela pulls Brennan out of the waiting room and towards the exit. "What did he say about…"

"He's sending a sample off for testing." Brennan. "I've to call the day after tomorrow for the results."

"Good, okay." Angela says. "So we just have to get through the next two days." She immediately starts thinking about how she can help Brennan hide her secret. She knows her friend is going to be all over the place until she knows the results and when Brennan spends so much time at the lab with her, Hodgins and Zach, they are bound to realise something is up. _I can hardly blame her emotions on too much work like I did to Booth, the guys know what's going on at the lab._

"Angela?"

"Sorry sweetie, I was thinking."

"About?"

"About how we're going to handle Jack and Zach."

Brennan makes a real effort at work to contain her scattered emotions but she finds it nearly impossible. Despite using all her self control she finds herself snapping at her team and finally she hides out in her office leaving Zach to handle most of the work himself. She relies on Angela to come up with a suitable excuse for her, knowing she's going to owe her friend big time when this is all over.

"Hey Angela!" Hodgins calls the young woman over late in the afternoon. "What is going on with Brennan?" he asks.

"What do you mean?" Angela asks.

"Oh come on. The good Doctor has been acting very strangely lately and don't tell me you haven't noticed." Hodgins stares at Angela, waiting for an explanation.

"Jack." Angela begins.

"There's something going on isn't there?" Hodgins asks. "I know a conspiracy when I see one."

"Jack, there is nothing going on." Angela states. "Brennan is under a lot of pressure from her editor to churn out more of her novel and she's suffering writers block." Angela lies. "There are deadlines and financial implications and she's feeling the pressure."

"Oh." Hodgins sighs. _I was hoping for a juicy story_.

"She'll be fine in a few days when it's all over." Angela tells him. "Until then just give her some space okay."

"Sure, I can do that."

"Good." Angela leaves him to his bugs and is about to walk away. "Oh Jack." She turns to him again. "Can you ask Zach not to bother her too?" she asks.

"Sure Angela." With his nod Angela heads off to let Brennan know she has the squint squad under control. _God I'm a good liar_ she thinks. _Should I be worried?_

After two very stressful days filled with tearful outbursts, sullen quiet moments and uncontrollable emotion, Brennan is finally able to call her doctor and get the results. Angela insists on being with her when she makes the call from her apartment late in the afternoon.

"Do you want me to call?" Angela asks as Brennan holds the phone in her hand.

"No, I can do this." Brennan tells her. "Angela, what if it's positive?" she asks.

"Brennan, I know you and I know you can handle whatever happens." Angela says. "No matter what you think, you'll make a good mom. You're strong and I know you don't feel ready but you're not alone in this." Angela tries to comfort Brennan. "If there is a little Brennan in there." She gestures to Brennan's stomach. "he or she is going to have an amazing Aunt and three fantastic uncles." She smiles.

"Three." Brennan sighs.

"You know Booth will be beside you though this don't you?" Angela asks.

"I don't know Angela. I mean sure Booth and I are good friends but…"

"Sweetie, the man cares about you deeply. He won't turn his back on you." Brennan sighs and starts to dial the number.

"I guess I should do this." She says as she lifts the receiver to her ear. After waiting on hold for a minute or so Brennan is patched through to her doctor. Angela sits anxiously beside Brennan, feeling every emotion Brennan is probably feeling. She watches her friend's face intently as she listens to the doctor but Brennan's face gives nothing away.

"Thank you." Brennan says as she hangs up.

"So?" Angela asks.

"It's negative." Brennan states. A smile erupts on Angela's face and she pulls Brennan into a hug.

"I am so happy for you." She says.

"Yeah, me too." Brennan sighs with intense relief and a little smile spreads across her face. "It's over." She sighs.

"It's over." Angela repeats.

Brennan is still feeling incredibly relieved when she arrives for work early in the morning. She heads straight for her office and sorts through some paperwork she has ignored for days before the rest of her team arrives. She knows she's been almost unbearable the last three days as her emotions have spiked and fallen. And she knows she owes Booth an apology. He's been avoiding her since she freaked out on him. She hasn't even spoken to him since she ran out of her office three days ago. But first she needs to apologise to her team. They have been incredibly patient, especially since they don't know the real reason for her recent behaviour. She meekly makes her way to the platform where the team is gathered and summons strength from deep inside to say what she seems to say very rarely.

After receiving forgiveness from Zach and Hodgins, Brennan heads back to her office. As she walks in she finds Booth sitting in her chair with his feet up on her desk and a big smile on his face. _When did he get here? Why didn't I see him arrive? _She thinks.

"So Angela says it's safe to come back." He grins.

"Booth, I'm so…" she starts.

"No need to apologise Bones." He sits up and puts his feet on the floor. "Angela explained to me about the heavy workload you've had to deal with. I'm just sorry I piled more on when you were stressed out."

"That's not entirely…" she tries to say. _I feel I should tell him the truth_

"Bones, Bones, Bones." Booth rises to his feet and walks over to her. "Everyone gets stressed out once in a while. Truth be told I'm surprised you haven't freaked out before now." He plants his hands on her shoulders. "I'm just glad you're back." He searches her eyes for the sparkle he's used to seeing.

"Yes." She states. "I guess I am back." She smiles and Booth relaxes when the sparkle returns.

"Good, because we have a lot to catch up on now that your desk is clear."

"The Henderson case." She sighs.

"I did a little research." Booth turns Brennan to walk her out of her office. "Seems we missed something."

"What?" Brennan asks. As they walk out to the platform where Zach has retrieved the evidence, Brennan tunes out Booth's voice and finds herself thinking about how lucky she is to have a partner so understanding, especially when she's kept things from him.

"So?" Booth asks.

"Hmm?" Brennan turns and realises Booth has asked her a question.

"I uh…"

"You didn't hear a word I said did you?" Booth grins.

"Sorry, I was thinking." Brennan replies.

"As usual." He bumps her arm with his elbow gently. "Don't go getting all stressed on me again, I don't know if I can take it."

"Don't worry Booth." Brennan tells him. "I am never 'getting stressed' again."

**_Okay so I wanted to write a fic where Booth didn't come running to the rescue. I tried to keep this in character and I figured that Brennan probably wouldn't tell Booth something as personal as thinking she was pregnant. I hope you liked it, or at least don't think it's awful _**


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